random shit


MAGE OF BREATH

DERSE DREAMER

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combeferret:

fivetail:

pyreo:

snergelly:

"bollocks" is such a funny word to me like what is a bollock

testicle.

it’s literally a testicle

are you telling me that “bollocks” is literally just the english way of cursing “balls”

are you telling me that people didn’t know that

(via some-lady-or-another)

wilwheaton:

(via Poorly Drawn Lines – Accepted)

best-of-funny:

jawhaw:

captainabs:

the-kiwi-avenger:

consulting-god-of-badassery:

incurablyspooky:

daemon-hearts:

A minute of silence for all the good books with bad movie adaptions.

A minute of silence for all the bad books that are getting movie adaptations.

A minute of silence for books with the movie adaptation on the front cover.

A minute of silence for The Last Airbender.

Ten minutes of silence for The Last Airbender.

Two hours of stunned horrified silence for The Last Airbender.

(Source: theboysofwinterfell, via captainlucifer)

"Give yourself over to absolute pleasure."

(Source: vintagegal, via some-lady-or-another)

and-then-sara:

autumnhound:

iraffiruse:

Satisfying things

THANK YOU THE OTHER SERIES PISSED ME OFF SO BAD

THIS ONE SOOTHES ME

Not gonna lie… I feel very at ease when I look at this photoset.

(via some-lady-or-another)

One time in class, I got fed up

This was one of my favorite teachers ever, he didn't believe in homework and was just the coolest dude ever
Teacher: I won't be here tomorrow so I left worksheets for the teacher to give you.
Kid: why can't we watch a movie?
Teacher: because the school board doesn't like us to show you movies that don't have anything to do with the curriculum. They say that movies are for home and we need to keep your home life separate from your school life.
Me: then why do they give us homework?
Whole class: .....
Teacher: .....
President: .....
Miley Cyrus: ....
Me: ....
Teacher: Samantha, please. Whatever you do. Bring this up with the principal because that's the best argument I have ever heard.

chusska-art:

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Actual 5 year olds.

(via herr-mozart)

charlielucky:

more interesting alternatives to the typical ~sexy suave evil gentlemen~ vampires:

  • vampires who use their shape shifting/magical glamor abilities to explore gender identity/presentation/protect themselves from societal norms that could be harmful or get in their way
  • vampires who suffer chronic pain from injuries they got as humans that didn’t heal right
  • vampires with possibly outdated prosthesis because while they have a healing factor they can’t regrow limbs
  • child vampires whose fangs fall out/regrow every couple decades because they’ll always be baby teeth
  • poc vampires who adapt better because they’re less sensitive to sunlight/have vastly different ethereal characteristics than “I am a marble statue with shiny eyes”
  • vampires who have trouble maintaining their animal forms and/or accidentally turn into wolves/mice/bats in the middle of a conversation
  • vampires who love modern technology and gadgets and take to them better than humans do
  • vampires who lisp because their fangs are too big/uneven for their mouth
  • vampires who are really concerned about how short they’re starting to seem compared to modern humans 
  • vAMPIRES (๏◡๏ ✿)

(Source: renfields, via monobeartheater)

lifee-in-pictures:

murdercityboulevard:

niknak79:

Keep it sweet. Do not eat.


Dear one freshman couple at lunch

omnivoice:

neongenesisevangaylion:

NEW noise canceling headphones that are so good at blocking out sound that they even prevent you from listening to your own music, forcing you to bask in the whispers of the forgotten gods until you begin to hear your own brain falling apart as it descends into madness

and now, the weather

(via some-lady-or-another)

Student: I sprained my finger and can't play gym.
Teacher: okay.
Student: I have an anxiety disorder and can't do my speech in front of the class.
Teacher: Everybody gets nervous. Get up there.

jadelust:

when ur teacher asks whos presenting next
image

(via captainlucifer)

Art by Heather Theurer

(Source: mickeyandcompany, via karcuddles)

thesassycat:

uglyaustralian:

thesassycat:

Everytime
Every single god damn time I reach for the mouse I accidently grab my tiny violin case

why have you got a tiny violin case

for my tiny violin